I went to the club again last saturday. I was soooo not into it, and in fact, was so bored out of my mind I was ready to walk out and sit in the car for an hour rather than endure the pain of crappy pop songs being played by the probably-horribly-drunk-DJ (he was playing enough bad songs that if he WASN'T drunk, may god have mercy on his soul). It was painful. I couldn't dance. Couldn't find the beat saturday night. I'm too white. bwahaha.

Happy Hands was there, but made no attempt to molest me this time, though it was discovered that he likes the girls with much booty. In other words, he likes us girls with a little extra padding. I saw him dancing with 3 different girls, and he went home with one of them. Good for him. Getting laid. Wo0t!

2 guys attempted to dance with me this time. The first one was a 400lb man wearing a hawaiian like shirt that said 'Paco' all over it... therefore, he is deemed Paco. Paco liked me a lot. Well, first he liked Jill's purse a lot and asked her questions about it (did you make it? where did you buy it? it's cool!), then he proceeded to like something that breathes, and was all up on me. Trying to grind. It does not work when two people are so fat. Hell, it does not work when ONE person is so fat. You just... can't move down there. Sorry man, but your attempted humping against my leg and ass did not work. And I felt claustrophobic. Couldn't do it. Left and went and got a drink instead. Sorry Paco... no me gusta.

Later on in the night I was standing off to the side just watching people... I was enjoying people-watching rather than bored-dancing. Paco came over to me and tried to strike up a mini-conversation.

"Are you having fun?" he asked.
"No." I bluntly replied.
"I could kind of see that." he laughed.
"Is it that obvious? haha"
"Are you gonna come back next week and dance with me again?"
"Probably not."
"Why not?"
"I'm not having any fun! At this rate, I'll never come back here again!"
"Well, I know something that could make your evening a whole lot better."
"Oh yeah?"
"Yeah. And it would improve mine greatly too."
"Yeah? What is it?"
"How 'bout you come home with me and I'll show you. I think you'll enjoy it quite a bit." he said with a sly smirk.
*throws head back with maniac laughter* "BWAHAHAHAHA. Sorry cowboy, ain't gonna happen."
"Positive?"
"Absolutely."
"Well... you're missing out... I bite real hard."

He then purrs into my ear, grabs my ass, and continues to do an ass graze as he walks away.

I turned, looked back at the dance floor, and burst out in to a laughter so loud that people started to look at me like I was crazy. It was absolutely hilarious. Oh, that Paco. What a silly silly fat man.

I watched Jill with her fucking gorgeous rich Portugese man for a while, and then Shaun dragged me out onto the floor, where I did an extremely white side to side dance for and probably an hour. Bored out of my mind, Shaun's dancing with this absolutely fugly guy simply because she's horny.. she hadn't seen him yet though so she didn't know he was a horny fugly dude, and the DJ continues to play horrible music. Three Britney Spears songs in 15 minutes? What the fuck, Mr. DJ? What the fuck?

A cute-ish guy then came over to me and started dancing with me. He didn't dance with my ass, he actualy danced with me, face to face, which made me extremely uncomfortable. That's the Asperger's part of it all. I couldn't look him in the face at all or anything. And I was dancing like crap. But this guy didn't care. We tried to make small talk but I couldn't hear anything he said and he couldn't hear anything I said. Basically, anyways. His name was Michael, and he goes to college in the cities. And he's from South Africa... he's got a really really thick accent. He thought I danced really really well and asked if I took dance lessons. haha. I just laughed loudly again. These silly men! Our dancing was god awful and clumsy, but we had fun, and he gave me big hugs after the night was over and asked me to come back next week and dance with him again. I told him I'd see if I could, but I might have to work. Which is true, but not, because it's my brother's birthday and I have to find someone to work for me. But yea. The club was really really lame, and Shaun and I want to go check out another club, though this is proving to be a difficult task because Jill needs to meet up with her Portugese man at the Stargate. Damn her for having such a hot fellow. I can't even explain what he is like. Oi.

So. Yes. That was that. There were other major factors involved that made the evening a complete bust, but I don't feel like talking about them right now. I'll just say Gabrielle is an asshole, and I'll expand on the reasons why he is such a complete and total asshole later. Asshole. grr.

In other news, Shaun and I made a trip to Sex World the other night. I bought my first vibrator. Actually, first two vibrators. They're nice. =) One's too big though, and the other one is small enough, but doesn't vibrate enough, which the big one is heaven in a vibrating form. Perfect. I just need to experiment with them more maybe. Yes. That must be it.

But I'm in too much of a weird mood right now to even think about doing that. I just need to get to sleep and go to school tomorrow and stop skipping my Music Theory class like I have 2 times this week. Bad Jessica, Bad. grrr. hrm.

I'm unhappy right now.